i'm gorgeous, but only when i'm airbrushed

Who knew standing in line at the grocery store could make a person feel very ugly? So there I stand, so innocently, with my ice cream and bag of chips, while perfectly airbrushed celebrities stare at me from their glossed pages. It is at this exact moment that I tilt my head down and look at my own body and find myself wondering why my abs don't shimmer like that under florescent lighting, or why my hair doesn't feather out around my face when I standstill.

I was never one of those preadolescence who flipped through the pages of magazines and religiously compared themselves to the images enhanced by airbrushing. I'm thankful for that, yet I feel for those girls who do. What message is that sending? Body image is such a huge issue in the media right now and has been for such a long time that it makes me wonder why is our society's standard of beauty determined by how well an editor can airbrush? Or for that matter, what even is beautiful?

If attractive was considered fat and pimply, then that's what would be gracing the covers of magazines. But it's not. And who decided that?

I understand that magazines and ad companies aren't directly at fault for the public's perspective of beauty, but I can't help but wonder if because they feed into it so heavily if they, in turn, are?

i wish i had a famous father

I'm about five seconds away from calling my dad's office at GE and asking them if they need someone to blog about my father. I could offer up vital pieces of information about his favorite foods, morning habits, TV schedule and other newsworthy topics. I'll even throw in a picture or two pre-shower.

And when they offer me tons of money to do this, I will make it clear that at no time will I comment on anything to do with his actual job.

we did this completely on purpose, but this was not our intent

Shame on you Courant. Seriously? Not only do I find this whole situation completely ironic, but also a little insulting.

I'm not an avid Courant reader, nor will I now become one, as I find their 245 years of "integrity and credibility" sounding more like a banner line than the actual truth. Maybe I'm being a bit harsh, and dare I say, judgmental, about this entire issue, but I can't help but find the humor in it all. Here is a newspaper that serves as a source of news and entertainment to countless people, a paper that we trust, and they thank us by ripping other newspapers off? What's the point of that?

The entire job as a journalist is to report credible information. To cite and protect your sources all while creating a piece worthy of reading. I feel like on day one of journalism school (if there was such a place) there would be a chart stating the rules to follow, much like a kindergarten classroom, and on top of that list, in big capital letters would be the words, DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. And wouldn't you think that even the journalist themselves would feel insulted by the mere thought of plagiarizing another writer's work?

Oh and by the way, thank you Richard Graziano for disciplining those six employees, I hope that their short trip to the corner really hurt their feelings. I wonder if universities will take notice and maybe change their academic ethics policies? I'd love to be a fly on the wall in that meeting when the dean tells the student, "What you did was wrong, I think you should go apologize to your professor. But have a fun weekend!" Case closed. Good role model Courant.

So I can't help but wonder, are there really no new ideas anymore? Are sporadic trips to the water cooler now filled with talk such as "Oh wow, that sounds good, okay, I'll just take that, and OH! good one, I'll take that one too" all while holding a copy of the Journal Inquirer? I guess all those involved in office relationship drama can rest easy now.

oh! It's 10pm, time for the news, er--i mean, opinions

BREAKING NEWS AT 10PM streaming live into your home television set.

Yeah? No. I already know it. I read it, online, all day long.

News really has become a 24/7 kind of thing. There used to be a time, or so I've heard, when the internet wasn't the end all be all of everything interesting and news worthy. Now, who even waits til 10? Information is so readily available and updateable, (that's not a word) that the mystery of a regularly scheduled news programming becomes, almost, not needed? Feel free to totally disagree, I find myself even while writing to disagree with myself. However, it's interesting once I start thinking about how everything is thrown right in your face. You cannot possibly ignore what is going on in our world. Whether it is what latest celebrity train wreck blew through the headlines that day, or a murder mystery in our backyard. As I double click on my Firefox icon, Yahoo! pops up and I am face to face with articles debuting NFL plays and Emmy surprises. The vast array of newsworthy topics almost seems to broaden as the capability and speed of "reporting" grows. Apparently everything has become news.

romance or tv dinner...

Apparently, there aren't so many lonely souls out there spilling their feelings over a gallon of ice cream being comforted by their happily coupled friends. According to pew, all those lonely singles out there need to stop complaining and actually take a shower, take off the sweats and join the fun. But how? Internet dating services? I can't speak for the world, but don't all those cases of crazy people hunting active lookers make you hesitate just a little before clicking the SIGN UP NOW button, or however they do it...? I know a few people who have trusted the internet, released personal information and are not currently being stalked or threatened by some creeper. But the question remains the same...does it work?

I would think it would take some of the fun out of it. Like that feeling when you're out somewhere and you see a cute guy, your eyes meet from across the room, you smile shyly, he coyly winks and starts walking your way, your pulse quickens and you become suddenly aware of every inch of yourself, the outfit you picked out, the way your hair is probably frizzing and smelling like cigarettes, and as he approaches, you fall in love. Oh crap, wait a second, I'm in make believe land. Let's rephrase...this doesn't happen. Instead, you're at that same bar, wearing the same outfit, standing on a floor that must be coated in some kind of super stick glue and some drunk girl pushes by you, spills her beer down the back of your dress, and leaves you feeling utterly annoyed. Not to mention the hottie on the other end can't see through his beer goggles.

So do I blame that vast majority of non lookers? The giver-up-ers of the world? Not so much. I live in a small town where the guys care more about their trucks than they do about anything worthwhile. The local hangout consists of a parking lot that creeps me out, and a bar that we refer to as "the dirt bar." Lucky me. While I admit, I may be taking a long walk down cynical lane, I can't help but wonder if there's anything out there worth waiting around for. Probably, but how? Only 1% of Americans meet on a blind date or through the internet, so what's the point of online dating services? To give people hope? Something to hold onto? Couldn't that be considered as false hope?

Maybe when I find myself having a midlife crisis, single and pissed off, I'll readdress this issue. Or create a profile...